Dear Current Generation Consoles…

I would like to address each of you individually to address you all about the benefits and faults of your online marketplaces, hopefully making future updates pay attention to these issues and making the gaming community benefit as a whole.

First, I would like to talk to Nintendo:
Dear Nintendo, your marketplace sucks. Plain and simple. I was one of the first people that purchased a Wii and was disappointed by the market place the moment I hooked it up. It is slow, the wireless is unreliable and the “Points” system flat out doesn’t work. Having to enter every single bit of your personal information EVERY SINGLE TIME you need to make a purchase of points (not all of which you even NEED for the game you actually want) is absolutely asinine. Given that you are the entertainment company with the longest time on the market, I am wholly disappointed in the fact that you can’t figure out the best way to make us shell out money for games that we already played, beat, replayed and rebeat (is that a word?) on the same systems that the original game came out on. (Yes, I’m guilty of this on about 9 accounts). Make an account system and stop making me take my damn credit card out of my wallet every time I want to play something that came out on a system that you used to make. Not to mention that anything original that you put out is let out without any kind of demo system in place. The thing that you need to understand is that people don’t want to pay money for things that they don’t already know or understand. I have let quite a few games on your system get through my hands, simply because of the fact that there was no demo provided. If there was a readily accessible demo available for the games released on your platform, I… would probably still avoid it because of the god awful market system you have in place. But I would be far more enticed by the slew of original games you have come through your system.

Moving on.

The next victim to the stand is Xbox 360:
Dear Xbox 360, while you are  guilty of the same ridiculous points system that the Wii tries to tout as necessary, you at least offer demos of every title in your library. I can tell you that, even though I have an extremely odd number of points left in my account (I believe it ends in a 7), I do derive the greatest amount of joy from your marketplace. The mere fact that I am able to download a demo of any of the titles in your arcade or independent section before I actually have to make a purchase is nothing short of brilliant. Again, I have to admit to being an impulsive (if not stupid) consumer and admit that I have made purchases simply based on the fact that I have only enjoyed 2-3 minutes of game play or was promised an achievement if I were to make a purchase “Right Now!” However, the fact still stands that, that purchase was made after I was able to play the game and make my own decision as to whether or not I would enjoy it. I wasn’t told by online reviewers, I wasn’t swayed by advertisers, I played the game and decided for myself that I WANTED to purchase that game. And to that, I salute you Xbox 360 Marketplace. However, DO NOT let yourself think that that fact lets you off the hook for the whole Points fiasco. As stated above, that whole system is completely stupid, I should be able to purchase the amount of points I need for the transaction I want to make, no less, no more (unless, you know, if you could sweeten the deal with a discount… which I know you won’t do… greedy bastards).

Last, but certainly not least.

Ahem P…S…3…,
You have the (proud?) distinction of being able to say that you can boast the benefits from both of the previously mentioned consoles. Since you are a console with a few generations behind you, you can tout the fact that people can download titles from those previous consoles. Given that the only way they could play them on the consoles they were originally intended for would set them back several hundred dollars (a PS1 and Final Fantasy 7 would cost yours truly $599.74 with a cursory glance on Amazon.com) and you tell me I can buy it on the Playstation Network for $10.00. SHIT YEAH, I’M GOING FOR THAT!!!! Which brings me to my next point: Thank you Sony, thank you for understanding how people want to spend their money when it comes to….. well, just about everything. People want to spend as much money as it will take to get what they want. They do not want to spend $10 to get 1000 points for something that they only needed to spend 800 points on. Thank you for understanding that, when I need to spend 14.45 on a purchase, I want to spend 14.45 on that purchase. Somehow you have figured out the sacred ritual of spending exactly the amount needed to buy something, no more, no less. And I appreciate you for it. HOWEVER, do NOT think that you are off the hook for any kind of scathing remark. You my friend are also dipping into the Nintendo pool of suckdom, in the fact that you need to understand that people want to know what they are getting into with their purchases before spending money on them. Having a readily available demo for everything that is offered in your online store isn’t beneficial only for the consumer, it is also beneficial for you. Since people are more willing to purchase something that they have been allowed some time to get to know. Even if it is only 15 minutes or so of play time.

So there it is.
And here it is in condensed format:

• Nintendo sucks on all fronts.
• Microsoft is awesome in figuring out that folks want to play the games first.
• Sony knows that what you want to spend is how much you need to spend.

Basically: Nintendo’s market place needs to go find a lonely field to lie down in and sleep for a long time, while Microsoft’s demo capability and Sony’s money management system should have a roll in they hay and come up with something that makes sense to all folks involved. Really, it would make a lot of people happier… Or… at least me. And isn’t that really what matters anyway?